i'll spread my wings and i'll learn how to fly was played on 2005-05-31 at 11:21 p.m.:

today is the worst day ever.

my car over heated and i blew a gasket. i'm leaking antifreeze and i can't drive it without it overheating and beeping at me.

we went to put the down payment on the apartment.. $400..and now i'm going to have to bow out and leave them hanging bc i can't afford to have a new car..or fix my old one and have the apartment..lyssa is telling me to get another job...i'm already stressed as it is. i want this so badly..but i mean..my grandma died..we're in debt bc of her medical bills..i can't really count on my mom for money...i wanted so much to move out..

god i could taste it.

i feel like i've let everyone down. i'm so upset..i smoked 5 cigs today..and i found out i'm going to wesport on monday...

my gma died...no apartment...car is broken..moving to wesport..pmsing like a bitch..this went so badly today...i'm so upset..i think i have an ulcer.

i dont' know what to do..i'm letting down lyssa and dee..but..better i back out now and only lose 100 then me do it anyway and not be able to pay rent.

god i'm so mad..frustrated..hurt..disappointed..i want to cry.and yell and scream at god..at everyone...

i dont know it i can take staying home..mom said she would make my curfew till 2..adn see what happens after that..but that isnt' really much consolation..i had this planned for 5 months!!!!

talk about a let down.

i feel so terrible. i'm a bad person..i can't believe this...

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